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网络时代的11个约会新词

Buisness Insider 2017年10月03日

现代约会里的新概念太多了,想全面了解还挺不容易的。

随着约会软件日渐强大,现代浪漫故事也变得乏味起来。就连约会时种种窘迫情景都有了新术词。

最新一个词就是“隐藏关系”,意思是感觉上你跟某人好像关系很密切,但是对方从来不向朋友介绍你。还有个词很流行,叫“玩消失”,意思是你跟某人正约着会,对方突然就消失了。

现代约会里的新概念太多了,想全面了解还挺不容易的。

下面列出了最常用的11个约会新词,赶紧学习下与时俱进。

隐藏关系

隐藏关系是指偷偷摸摸约会,可能你也会深受其害。通常这种情况下,你约会的对象从来不把你介绍给朋友和家人,也从不在社交媒体上发布跟你有关的内容。简单来说,你是对方的神秘男友或神秘女友,他们把你“藏”在一角还觉得心安理得,在外表现得若无其事,保持着骑驴找马的状态。

玩消失

玩消失可能是最著名的约会术语了,具体是指你跟某人约着,那人突然就失联了。你们可能约会了几天,也可能几年,但有一天对方就是消失了。不回短信,还有可能拉黑你,省得分手谈判。这种人都是懦夫,但倒霉的是好像总能遇上,尤其是现在人人手机里都有一堆约会软件,选择实在太多。

僵尸跳

如果你之前遇到约会对象玩消失,结果某天那人又突然出现,这就叫僵尸跳。一般来说距离此人消失会有些时间,但那人会表现得好像没事发生过,就像稀土动画片里一脸拽酷的僵尸一样。某天可能WhatsApp上突然会蹦出一句“嗨”或是什么类似打招呼的话,等着你回复。现在社交媒体太发达,僵尸闯回你生活的方式很多,可能重新粉上你,或是在Instagram、Twitter之类地方总给你发的东西点赞。

晾一边

如果你跟新伴侣没“正式谈”,确定彼此在交往的话,有可能你会被“晾一边”。就像体育比赛里一样,替补队员会坐在长凳上被晾一边,你也会感觉自己当成备胎,对方随时可能找别人。当然了,如果他们找不到更好的可能会回头找你,但如果真这样想的话两个人感情也就谈不上多深了,是吧?

追到就跑

享受追求感觉的人最喜欢用这种技巧。他们会使尽浑身解数写肉麻的话,一心就为了约你,“追到”你。一旦你答应约会了,他们立刻会失去兴趣,转向下一个目标。这种人享受的是过程,但另一方只会觉得困惑烦恼。

撒诱饵

“撒诱饵”意思是看起来某人像在追求你,但实际上他们根本没打算忠于某段关系。刚开始是很难看出来的,尤其是网上认识的人,因为从发的信息看他们是感兴趣的,但是很快就能看出来这些人说过的话根本做不到。他们只是喜欢撒诱饵而已,就像格林童话《奇幻森林历险记》里面韩赛尔和格雷特找到的面包屑一样,只是诱导他们的道具。

缓冲

如果你把某人当“缓冲”,意思是虽然你跟某人约会,但是心里觉得结局不会好。你不会直接分手,而是为分手做各种准备,例如多找别人聊天调情,只是为了减弱分手到来时的冲击。至于为什么不狠心咬牙直接分手了事,谁也搞不清。

钓鱼

“钓鱼”这个词是亨利·乔斯特、内夫·舒尔曼和阿里尔·舒尔曼制作的纪录片《钓鱼》中提出的,意思是某人在网络平台上拼命吹嘘,就为了把别人骗到手。后来这档变成MTV频道特别成功的节目,很多人找内夫和麦克斯调查跟自己聊天的人,看看对方是不是在吹牛。一般来说吹牛的人会偷取陌生人的资料,有时还创立多个人格,就为了把谎话说圆。真够恐怖的。

小钓

“小钓”就是比“钓鱼”程度轻一些,通常指在约会应用上表现得比实际中积极得多。例如只放很多年前的照片,或是严重P图,再或是对自己的年龄、工作、身高和爱好撒谎。其实一见面什么谎言都会戳穿,所以还是别扯了。

逐渐淡出

“逐渐淡出”有点类似玩消失,都是不愿意承诺的人。这些人对进一步发展关系没什么兴趣,但又不明说,只是逐渐淡出慢慢减少联系。一开始是不太回短信和电话,然后就是取消见面也不安排别的时间。最后你们不用正式谈分手,自然联系就断了。处理得多么成熟。

御宅季

9月到了,说明正式进入了御宅的季节。秋天和冬天一来,找个男朋友或女朋友的动力突然变大。随着夏天过去,室外活动机会减少了,很多寂静的夜里只能窝在家看电视,身边有个人陪还是挺好的。所以人们找个伴的愿望会加强,有时仅仅为了不要孤身一人会愿意降低标准随便找个人。好好享受吧!(财富中文网)

译者:Pessy

审稿:夏林

The convenience of dating apps has made the world of modern romance a pretty insensitive place.There are even new terms to describe the ways you can be poorly treated on today's dating scene.

The latest of these phrases is "stashing," which refers to when you're in a supposedly serious relationship with someone, but they don't introduce you to any of their friends. Another popular term is "ghosting," which occurs when someone you're dating vanishes without a trace.

With so many modern dating concepts out there, it can be hard to keep up.

Here's a list of 11 of the most commonly used modern dating terms to help get you up to speed.

Stashing

Stashing is the latest sly dating technique you may have been a victim of. It occurs when the person you're dating doesn't introduce you to their friends or family, and doesn't post about you on social media. Basically, you're their secret boyfriend or girlfriend, while they feel justified in "stashing" you in the corner, pretending nothing is going on to the outside world, and keeping their options open.

Ghosting

Ghosting is probably one of the best-known dating terms out there. It refers to when someone you've been seeing vanishes without a trace. You could have been dating someone a few days, or a few months, but one day they simply disappear. They don't return your texts, and may even block you to avoid having the break-up conversation with you. It's cowardly, but depressingly common, especially with a vast array of dating apps at our fingertips.

Zombie-ing

If you've been ghosted, the culprit may resurface one day. This is called zombie-ing. It's usually a fair amount of time after they disappeared into thin air, and they often act like nothing happened, like a cocky re-animated corpse. An innocuous "hey" might appear on WhatsApp, or something similar to tempt you to reply. Thanks to social media, the zombie might also try to get back into your life by following you and liking your posts on Instagram and Twitter.

Benching

Before you have "the talk" with your new partner about whether you are in an exclusive relationship, you are at risk of being "benched." Like the sports term, where players are left on the bench as reserves, you might find yourself being someone's back-up option as they continue to look around. They may come back to you if nobody better comes along, but that doesn't give one high hopes for the relationship, does it?

Catch and release

This technique is favoured by people who love the thrill of the chase. They'll put all their effort into flirtatious texts, and trying to date you, until they "catch" you. When you finally agree to the date, they immediately lose interest and seek out their next target. The culprit clearly gets something out of it, but for the victim it's just confusing and annoying.

Breadcrumbing

"Breadcrumbing" is when somebody seems to be pursuing you, but really they have no intention of being tied down to a relationship. It might be difficult to tell in the early stages, especially if you met online, because you'll receive a series of texts that suggest they are interested. However, it soon becomes clear that this person has no intention of following through with anything they've said. They just like leaving you breadcrumbs, like a trail in Hansel and Gretel, to string you along.

Cushioning

If you're "cushioning" someone, it means you're dating them but you don't think it's going to end well. Instead of cutting loose, you prepare for the break-up by chatting and flirting with several other people, to cushion the blow when it happens. Why they don't just bite the bullet and initiate the break-up themselves is a mystery.

Catfishing

The term "catfish" was coined by the documentary film Catfish by Henry Joost, Nev Schulman, and Ariel Schulman, and refers to when a person lures someone into a relationship by pretending to be someone else in an online platform. It has since become a hugely successful show on MTV, where people write in to ask hosts Nev and Max to track down people they are talking to online. They try and figure out whether the person is being catfished. Catfishes often steal photos from strangers' profiles, and sometimes even create multiple personas to make their stories more believable. Creepy.

Kittenfishing

"Kittenfishing" is like a less severe form of catfishing. It refers to when you present yourself in an unrealistically positive way on your dating apps — for example, by only using photos which are years out of date or heavily edited, or lying about your age, job, height, and hobbies. The lies are immediately obvious if you do meet up, so just don't do it.

Slow fade

The "slow fade" is a bit like ghosting, without the full commitment. They're not particularly interested in taking things further, but instead of saying so they gradually start to cut ties. First, they stop being as responsive to texts or calls, then they may cancel plans and be unwilling to arrange new ones. Eventually, the communication between the two of you dwindles into nothing without the decency of having a proper conversation. How mature.

Cuffing season

It's September. That means it's officially Cuffing Season, the period during the Autumn and Winter months where finding a boyfriend or girlfriend is suddenly a lot more appealing. Summer is over, and so are the fun outdoor activities, so a lot more dark evenings will be spent inside watching television, and that's a lot more fun to do when you have company. As a result, people are more willing to couple up and make compromises about who they invite over as a desperate bid not to be lonely. Enjoy!

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